One of the most vexing aspects concerning Arctic Monkeys is that many of their best songs are absent from their official albums. Devotees, fuelled by an unwavering ardour for the band, hold these B-sides in such high esteem that dedicated playlists to only those songs began to emerge online — and it’s easy to see why.
A deeper dive into Arctic Monkeys’ discography will reveal a vast number of hidden gems. It is hard to deny the foot-tapping appeal of ‘Stop The World I Wanna Get Off With You’ or the introspective beauty of ‘The Bakery’. However, amid the plethora of undiscovered soundscapes, ‘Curtains Closed’ occupies a niche known to even fewer fans, to the extent that its mere mention will often elicit quizzical, raised eyebrows.
Nestled in a space that intersects the exuberant, northern irreverence of Whatever People Say I Am, That’s What I’m Not and the energetic vigour of Favourite Worst Nightmare, ‘Curtains Closed’ is a staple of the band’s indie rock authenticity. Bolstered by scorching guitars and a rhythm that could easily command an alternative music nightclub, the track encapsulates Arctic Monkeys’ trademark rawness and vitality.
In true adolescent Arctic Monkeys fashion, the song details a seemingly frustrating relationship, as lead singer Alex Turner sings about a girl he’s angry with before concluding, “I must be mad”. At first glance, though, deciphering the precise subject of his discourse becomes somewhat challenging – the song lacks the lyrical fluency that graced the early creations of Arctic Monkeys, as Turner croons: “I don’t care about your massage oils / It’s got my skin going red / Cause I’m a mad mother-fucker / With my curtains open / Sitting tucked up in bed”.
Fans still enjoy the song, though, with some even likening it to a mix between ‘Mardy Bum’ and ‘Black Treacle’. Either way, it’s a stark reminder of the mastery the band already had during their Favourite Worst Nightmare era. It’s puzzling to many why the song didn’t make it onto the album, even considering the record already boasted an array of Arctic Monkeys’ most resounding hits, like ‘Brianstorm’, ‘Teddy Picker’, ‘Fluorescent Adolescent’, and ‘505’.
In truth, ‘Curtains Closed’ could have easily and seamlessly replaced some of the album’s weaker tracks, like ‘The Bad Thing’ or even ‘Balaclava’. That’s not to say those tracks are objectively bad, but ‘Curtains Closed’ potentially seems like a more fitting insert. On reflection, however, perhaps the song became a discarded B-side because it sounded a little too Whatever People Say I Am. By the time the band had recorded Favourite Worst Nightmare, Arctic Monkeys were already maturing significantly, and, with the exception of tracks like ‘This House is a Circus’, they were becoming more refined and dynamic than their anthemic and charged debut.
In hindsight, knowing which direction the band was taking, it is perhaps no surprise that they opted to discard ‘Curtains Closed’. The song has the familiar ahead-of-its-time appeal of Whatever People Say I Am but lacks the accomplished feel of its superseding record. Still, however, it’s an impressive feat considering the band were very much shiny and new at the time. Playing together in a garage with nothing but a desire to be The Strokes, Arctic Monkeys’ early material was outstanding – and the influx of B-sides that appeared at the time and afterwards just proved how much their talent was brimming.
